12/30/20: The Temptations of Buddha Rick — Mission Accomplished! #poetry
This is a poem
It’s not a religious text
I am not a Buddhist
I am not an expert regarding Buddhism
The Buddha rejected a life of asceticism and a life as a prince
Stephen Sondheim was upset after his play “Merrily We Roll Along” got bad reviews
“They will accept you as a commercial success or accept you as a starving artist, but not both.”
Buddha Sondheim
That resonates with me
I’m Buddha Rick
I was penniless and daring once
Some people celebrated me
but they never gave me a job
I had substantial professional jobs
Paid well for my take on things
up to a point
But then obedience was required
Penniless Rick did great work on stage that morphed into mysticism
I travelled through eternity onstage blind to latitude and longitude the audience or time
Undiluted reality is insanity
I extinguished my ego
and merged with the All
but left my shabby unkempt body behind
wild eyed
I was Icarus touching the sun in comedy clubs
Some cheered sincerely
Some egged me on
Some were confused
Some were concerned
Some condemned me
Some beat me physically
Most just left
I’m proud that I took things so far
It was heroic
There is a time for extremes
And this is not a bad memory
But …
It was
Not good
Mysticism is not good
If you get stuck in it
and thankfully I didn’t get stuck in it
I got on the cross but the crucifixion was aborted
All spirit and no nature
Spirit needs to fasten itself to the stuff of the earth
if you want to live
sanely
And I wanted to live
sanely
Penniless Rick needed money and a place
The journey continued
Substantial professional Rick got those things
but an attempt was made to use me as a tool
not long after I got them
Lobby state legislators to oppress poor people
More fines for truancy and poverty
Shame them as lazy!
Defend the death penalty
Cheat widows and orphans out of their insurance money
Punish a mentally ill lawyer at trial
Her illness treated as a crime
Persecute a poor elderly lawyer with a heart condition for missing a deadline
Teach ethics with a racial bias
Teach improvisation in a superficial way
Genuflect to power and money
Honor those things and the people who embody those things
and I’d get my piece of the pie
To my great pride and satisfaction
I did none of those things
I got fired a lot
but I did some good too
and I grew
I didn’t want to be a prince
and my asceticism ended long ago
The Buddha thought that the temptation of social duty
included opinion
an attempt to change the world to one’s vision
I often regretted that I didn’t fight more to change the corrupt institutions who paid me
and that I served honorably
and disappointed when I wouldn’t participate in their dishonor
but I was following my Buddha impulse
Conflict doesn’t change the world
No one successfully forces alterations to the nature of men and things
What changes the world is changing oneself
or more precisely being conscious of the changes of oneself
I am at an interesting point now
I don’t need a job to avoid the asceticism that I rejected years ago
The temptation of social duty disappears from my consciousness
I am not shamed any more by any inadequacy of money or fame or power or social status
Those are the duties of the society that I exist in
When I had to work to avoid asceticism
I did a good job I believe
of being self-sufficient and expressing my spirit
My court appearances, my classes, my blog in that period and my performances
were poems
outward expressions of my soul
not diminished by how out of place they were
inspiring and upsetting others
naturally
not from my intention
But there was always a limitation
in my consciousness, and by extension my opportunity
That past limitation doesn’t bother me
The world works through process
I was not derelict for not having full enlightenment
But since those not-so-long-ago days
I’ve learned that there is a solid and reliable abundance to creation
God supports and cares for artists
That is not something I read on a Hallmark card
I know it from experience
All needs are provided for those who serve God’s will
It has happened to me so many times
God sends me money and chances and helpers and love
He wants me to do my work
and keep body and soul together
I can live apart from the ascetic and the princes
The temptations of the Buddha were fear, desire and social duty
Fear and desire were always just passing states for me
Sensations more than existential difficulties
Social duty was the tough one
Society told me to be a powerful prince or a starving artist
I reject each temptation
In my next act
I will create
apart from the approval and disapproval of audiences
the desire for unnecessary personal suffering
and the bullying of bosses
and competitive peer groups.
There’s a reason that I write in installments
What’s next?
Write what you don’t know.
Copyright 2020 Richard Thomas
