10/11/20: Sea of Tranquility #poetry

10/11/20: Sea of Tranquility #poetry

It’s difficult in the beginning

You are scared

and always aware of being out of place

and it makes you timid

You are humiliated and hurt all of the time

You are a secret to yourself and the world

And then a person

and then a group of people

see you a little bit

not all of you

but just a little piece of what you haven’t admitted to yourself

You feel safe

for the first time since you were out on your own

and your soul reveals a little more of itself to you

a little

not completely

You explore your soul

and that cuts off your initial source of support

because the nature of the process

is that you outgrow things

what once delighted you

now chafes

paradise becomes a prison

an unknowable “more”

nags at you

demanding that you break away

and move upward

When you were afraid and shy, you were bullied

It’s not that way in this advanced stage

Now you are shamed

and insulted

Misunderstood

Not getting credit for that which deserves the most credit

Your soul has broken the rules

the norms

You crack up the first time you experience this

and then you get used to it

You just keep wanting something more

Bliss is advertised as the map to the soul

what is less discussed

is all of the pain

You really loved where you were

and who you were with

But you had to go

And then the wandering starts

Leap after leap after leap

Failure after failure after failure

preferred to successes that happen that you don’t want

Your confidence is shaken

again, but it is different this time

experience tells you that doubt is always resolved

that experience and divine impulse

whispers messages to you

that years of suffering can end

in the epiphany of a single moment

You start looking forward to confusion

you know its resolution will make you bigger

infuse you with more of the soul’s energy

You are an innocent in the world

who is actively courting knowledge

wandering

a cartographer

an interested tourist

Person to person

Place to place

Searching, searching

Sorting, sorting

listening intently

figuring out when the soul speaks to you

and when the world speaks to you

You always choose the soul’s words in the end

It’s the way it is

You chose this path

and when you waver the world cooperates

It is too late for the world to let you back in

You have abandoned all prescribed routes

Oh if only, you weep and wail

But your soul cheers

You hang in there

and your soul gives you something more than the world can ever offer

The world is disappointed with you

and that haunts you

but the soul knows what is best

for you

and the world

Finally you stop listening to what the world is telling you all together

You hear why the world speaks as it does

and rely on your soul

exclusively

It turns out that the world has disappointed you as much as you have disappointed the world

You become proud of yourself

Your integrity taught you

surprisingly

discernment

You have chosen wisely

You’ve lived

Sure-footedly

even when it felt as if you were stumbling

You face the world as an equal

You are no longer conflicted in any way

Your conscious life now is the same as your unconscious life

You honor your soul as you always have

only this time you know it.

Your Mystical Body of Work

continues

far from the marketplace

you write a symphony

You never refused to do that which was worth doing

and never did anything that had no meaning

and the future

is a sea

of tranquility.

Copyright 2020 Richard Thomas

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